It is a question I get asked all the time …
The Guides …
So many looking for guidance in the realm of reconciliation. Who can we talk to? What does that word mean? HOW DO WE DO THIS?
The guides are among us, but they are not sitting in C-suite offices. Or maybe they are, but that isn’t what qualifies them for this work.
To explain …
If you want to create “safe spaces”, talk to someone who knows what it’s like to feel unsafe, someone who has created safe spaces, someone who can now teach you how to replicate that in your own environment.
If you want to know how to reconcile, talk to someone who has had to. Talk to the abused woman who has had to find reconciliation with her abusive partner, so that the kids could visit their Dad. (Never thought of the Canadian/indigenous relationship that way before? Perhaps it is time.)
Talk to the woman or man who has had to reconcile with a path that near destroyed them, but somehow managed to find the way.
Talk to the woman, man, youth, or elder who reconciled with what others thought of them, finally realizing that the opinions of others matter little compared to your own thoughts when you look in the mirror.
To be clear – most of our current privileged white straight male leadership cannot even COMPREHEND the magnitude of lack of safety. And in turn, they cannot even UNDERSTAND how multifaceted and emotionally draining reconciliation is for the harmed.
But those who have survived unsafe environments can. Those who have had to find some form of reconciliation with those they do not trust and do not like can. They know its possible because they have done it.
Today, my friend. This week, my friend, I pray you start listening to those who understand the size of the ask … the ones still asking and working and praying and guiding because they know the price of this work isn’t too high simply because it is so much cheaper than not finding safety or reconciliation.
The journey continues…
I love you!