Sandi's Blog

She’s Back… Only Better

 
I am awake, I am alive, and I am smiling THE biggest smile ever as I think and type the words:

She’s Back … Only Better!

While chatting with a friend yesterday, the revelation was as powerful as it was enjoyable, leaving us both laughing as we asked out loud,

“When the heck did that happen?!”

I shared how I pay my utility bills as they arrive now, realizing for the first-time a) I can and b) I am no longer poor.

Coming from a similar background, she shares how she can go to the grocery store any time she wants, to buy whatever she wants (no more waiting to payday, no more making do with “whatever is left” in the cupboard).

I shared how upon seeing Susan Aglukark at a recent event, how I just walked up, without a moment’s hesitation, and introduced myself (and how I was so glad I did, even if afterwards I asked myself “Who the heck was that?!” in reference to my boldness).

She shared how she wears whatever dang colour of clothes she wants now and if that happens to be monotone black, SO BE IT!

Yes, together we laughed at just how often we had stopped ourselves from wearing this or saying that out of fear of “what others might say”, in essence giving those “others” total control of our lives.

And then we laughed at how awesome it feels to be in the driver’s seat.

And to be clear, it’s not that “I don’t care” what others think anymore, in some “to heck with you” way (cuz that would mean they are STILL driving the bus). It’s just that nowadays, I don’t think of them before me. I don’t make what they want me to do a higher priority than what I want to do, especially when I know that what I want to do … is just be me.

So, this is me, the woman who CHOSE to get up at 5 a.m. to get that workout in. This is me, the woman who turned a very recent challenge into a blessing, within MINUTES of it occurring. This is me, smiling HUGE, from the heart, leaning into every joy Creator sends. Not because I am better than you but because we are ALL better than the scared, timid, unsure versions of ourselves.

This is me, shining. And no, it’s not too bright. It’s just bright enough to light up some pretty dark places, places where some of my friends are still trapped.

No judgement. Been there, done that but just fyi, it’s SO MUCH BETTER in the sun!
 

I love you!
HUGSSSSSSSS

Sandi
 

***This is an excerpt from Sandi’s most recent book, “I am Awake …”. available for purchase on her website or on Amazon.ca.***