I am awake, I am alive, and all I am thinking this morning is …
“There’s the line!”
It has happened numerous times in a multitude of ways in my past – another human lets you know what they will and will not put up with; you realize that your career cannot advance any further without change; the number on the weight scale is simply not one you can tolerate anymore; you have had enough of whatever; or in this case, your muscles tell you “There’s the line”.
My workouts have been amazing but over the last few weeks, a certain neck muscle has been aggravated. Yesterday, I was pretty sure I determined which exercise/reps/weight combo was the issue, but did that stop me from doing it?
“OF COURSE NOT!” she says, while shaking her head.
This morning, the muscle pain confirms, “Yep, that’s the one!”
As a result, today is a day of rest but just for a day, because as you may or may not have noted, THIS is a line, not a wall.
Members of marginalized, racialized or Indigenous groups are trained, through decades upon decades of examples, to give up. A first attempt is so often a last one, as failure confirms at a deep, emotional level our worst fear, that our oppressors were right. It is easier to walk away (less emotional pain and anguish), then to try again.
But those oppressors don’t know our resilience, our strength, our survival instincts and this woman NEVER walks away from something I truly want. So, today is a day of rest. Tomorrow, an adjustment to the workout and the journey continues.
Just like the times I adjusted my words so as not to offend a partner. Just like the times I went back to school or changed employers so as to continue my career advancement. Just like the day I decided enough was enough with what the weight scale was telling me.
Accept the things you cannot change but do not EVER make the mistake of thinking that the results of YOUR decisions are things you can’t change.
No walls, just lines.
The journey continues …
I love you!
HUGSSSSSSSS
Sandi
***This is an excerpt from Sandi’s most recent book, “I am Awake …”. available for purchase on her website or on Amazon.ca.***
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